Divorce is seldom simple. Legally and emotionally, it’s a winding process that can leave both partners reeling. While some believe divorce marks the end of therapeutic help, many mental health professionals, including Cristeta Rillera, LMFT, argue that couples therapy during divorce can provide invaluable support: not just for the relationship, but for each person’s healing and future growth.
What “Couples Therapy During Divorce” Looks Like
It’s essential to clarify what couples therapy, in the context of divorce, aims to achieve. Instead of preserving the marriage, it often shifts focus to:
- Communicating clearly and respectfully, even when emotions run high
- Setting boundaries around finances, parenting, and post-separation contact
- Processing grief, anger, guilt, and loss, all while navigating the changes ahead
Cristeta Rillera’s practice in Woodland emphasizes evidence-based tools like communication skill-building, emotional attunement, and conflict resolution, even amid relationship dissolution.
Why It Can Be Extremely Helpful
Here are several reasons therapy can be a critical resource during a divorce:
- Emotional Healing & Clarity
Divorce isn’t just a legal process: it’s deeply emotional. Partners often face intense grief, confusion, or guilt. Therapy provides a safe space to process these emotions without blame. With guidance, each person can gain clarity on what they need to heal and move forward. - Better Co-Parenting & Communication
If children are involved, divorces impact more than just the two adults. Therapy helps parents develop shared approaches for communication, decision-making, and boundaries with one another. This reduces conflict, protects the kids, and supports healthier relationships in the aftermath. - Reduced Conflict & Amicability
Even where the relationship is ending, therapy can help reduce damaging patterns, like blaming, stonewalling, or escalating arguments. With professional facilitation, couples can navigate disputes (about property, parenting, or logistics) more civilly. That often means less emotional toll, lower legal costs, and more dignity in how things end. - Personal Growth & Looking Ahead
Divorce gives a forced kind of momentum. Think of it as an opportunity to learn, adapt, and grow. Therapy can help individuals reflect: What boundaries did I not uphold? What communication patterns do I want to carry forward (or leave behind)? How do I rebuild trust – with myself – and prepare for new phases of life? - Legal and Practical Aid
Some therapy approaches help clarify legal decisions (especially around custody or shared property) by assisting couples in expressing their priorities and values. This doesn’t replace legal counsel, but it helps both sides approach negotiations or mediation with more understanding and less reactivity.
Are There Times When Therapy Might Not Be Necessary?
While many benefit, couples therapy during divorce isn’t always required, or even effective, under certain conditions:
- One partner refuses participation or is abusive (emotionally, physically, or psychologically). In these cases, safety must come first, and individual therapy or legal protection may be more appropriate.
- The relationship has long been deeply hurtful, without repair, even before divorce. Sometimes therapy can’t undo years of harm, but it can help with closure and healing.
- There are financial or scheduling constraints that make consistent therapy impractical. In such cases, even occasional counseling or support groups can offer significant benefits.
Connect With Cristeta Rillera For Couples Counseling Today
If you’re considering whether couples therapy is right for you, seeking a consultation with a licensed professional – someone experienced in divorce, relationships, and emotional trauma, such as Cristeta Rillera – can be a powerful first step. Reach out to Cristeta today by calling 530-302-6097!
